MARIO Day 2012

Today is MARIO Day again.  (Yes.. that's Mar. 10th for those folks who aren't aware of that famous holiday).. Today, we are all supposed to eat spaghetti or lasagna.. with plenty, plenty, plenty of garlic.. that magic herb.  Some years ago, when my grandchildren would stay overnight, we would celebrate MARIO Day (even if the month wasn't March) by cooking up "Garlic Eggs".. (with or without spaghetti).. some of my grandkids still think of "Garlic Eggs" as Prepop's delicious "soul food."

 Who you callin' fat?

Boston University biochemist Barbara Corkey says that she doesn't believe that overeating causes obesity or diabetes!

According to Bostonia Magazine, Barbara Corkey has five decades of metabolism research experience. She is Boston University's School of Medicine's Zoltan Kohn Professor in Medicine and is a much respected diabetes researcher.. one of her many recent awards was the Banting Medal for Scientific Achievement, the American Diabetes Association's highest honors.  

So.. Barbara knows whereof she speaks, and her utterances on the subject of obesity and diabetes deserve investigation.  She suspects that food additives (like emulsifiers and saccharin) as well as environmental factors (perhaps pesticides, arsenic poisoning, smoke) are involved in the development of obesity and Type Two diabetes. 

http://www.baderc.org/members/BarbaraCorkey.html


Incidentally, Barbara loves gourmet food and fine wine.. if you follow her on Twitter, you could get some tips on how to fill your life with "good taste."

Now this guy is just plain "fat".. at least above his shoulders.. in my humble opinion.

On the surface, Rush doesn't seem too worried about the reaction to his outbursts about Ms.  Fluke. However, under the surface he must be worried.. because he continues to lose sponsors.. I believe he has already lost Allstate Insurance, J.C. Penney, Sears, Bonobos Mens Clothes, AOL and Tax Resolution Services. I have a few questions to ask:

Why did Allstate and Sears and other national companies endorse Rush in the first place?

Why haven't American women recognised before now that they can have an enormous effect on American businesses?   Perhaps they have, but have not used their influence very often until now.

What will American women do, now that they are "on a roll" to get groups consisting of all men from deciding on things that affect women's lives? (Remember Lysistrata by Aristophanes!)

I saw a cartoon somewhere that showed someone looking like Rick Santorum being asked by a reporter: "How will women react to your views in the upcoming election?"  Rick's answer: "What!  When did women get the "vote?"   This is, of course, a silly joke.. but sometimes I think that we would do better if more women would get together and use their voting power to elect persons who have the best interests of all American people foremost, rather than keeping the "rich old boys club" status quo.

Loss of a genius!

I was saddened to read that Steve Bridges was found dead at his Los Angeles home last week.  He was only 48 years old.  Most people remember him for his wonderful impressions of George W. Bush.  A New York Times article mentions that it took make-up artist, Mari Enyart three hours to get Steve looking like "W."    He also did TV spots made up as Presidents Obama and Clinton.  Steve was also good at voice impersonations.. including  the aforementioned Rush Limbaugh.  His humor will be greatly missed. 

Isn't this for the birds?

I just got through filling our sunflow seed feeder and am watching little birds happily peck away.  I estimate that there are about 1,000 sunflower seeds left for them to peck.

Meanwhile, I read where the Tate Modern Turbine Hall in London has purchased 8,000,000 of the 100,000,000 porcelain sunflower "seeds" on display in 2010. This was an "artwork" created by Chinese artist Ai Weiwei.  Each of the 100,000,000 "seeds" was individually hand-painted by 1,600 Chinese citizens!  These "seeds" were then spread out all over the floor of the Tate.. and visitors were encouraged to "walk and roll" through the "seeds" to experience the art work on a personal basis.  This didn't last too long, because the "porcelain dust" proved too much for asthmatics and there may also have been lead in the paint that was used. 

The 92,000,000 remaining "seeds" were returned to Mr. Ai.  Tate officials are not revealing what they paid for the 8,000,000.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ai_Weiwei

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Seed you later.
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Medical Bits for kibitzing on a 70 Degree Day in February 2012

Doctor Vaughan wishes to give you some quick medical information and insights:

1. Diabetes.

Paula Deen, who shows us how to cook up such great southern-style tummy teasers has now joined the ranks of diabetes sufferers.  I guess she has been consuming too much of her delicious carb-filled creations.

2.  Cosmetic Surgery.

A recent Harper's Index indicates that 2,000 "designer vagina" operations were paid for by the British National Health Service last year.

3.  Sickness at Work.

Aaron Karo remarks in his "Ruminations" .."When faking sick to leave work early, I find it necessary to make a sick face until I'm at least a few miles from the office, just in case someone is following me and watching me."

4.  Vitamin Deficiency.

This is from a recent issue of the BBC Music Magazine : "Austrian experts... suggest that Mozart may have died of a lack of vitamin D.  The infections the composer was reported to have suffered from all hint at that deficiency, which would have been exacerbated by the lack of sunlight in the long Viennese winter.  Spookily, Mozart's Requiem is written in the key of, yes, D minor. Maybe he knew?"

5.  Throat Cancer.

Another composer, written about in the BBC Music Magazine by Adrian Mourby was Jean Sibelius. "Sibelius... belonged to a hard-drinking, hard-living set in Helsinki.  After an operation for throat cancer, he made sure there was a box of cigars waiting for him when he came round from the anaesthetic..."


6.  High Blood Pressure.

The world famous Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore, Maryland, was home-base for physiologist Joseph Erlanger's research on the nervous tissue of frogs.  While doing this research, Joe invented the sphygmomanometer which measures blood pressure and has probably helped save the lives of thousands of old dudes like me.  Erlanger was born in 1874 and died in 1965.

7.  Obesity.

Aaron Karo offers an observation on this malady: "I would be far thinner if I didn't have tastebuds."

(This could also be related to item #1 above.)

8.  Brain Malfunction.

Our old friend, Aaron Karo, also points to a malady affecting most of us: "Will I ever reach a point in my life when I won't need to recite the whole alphabet in my head while alphabetizing?"

9.  Pencilectomy.

Chuck Shepherd, was quoted in the recent issue of Funny Times: "The British Medical Journal reported that a 76-year-old woman had been unbothered until recently by the felt-tip pen she accidentally swallowed 25 years earlier.  It was removed without complication, and, though the plastic was flaky, the pen still had an ink supply and was 'usable'."

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Incidentally, if you would like to read more interesting medical information, try these wonderful sources:

Funny Times newspaper.
News of the Weird by Chuck Shepherd
Harper's Magazine
Ruminations.com by Aaron Karo

All can be readily found online.

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February 5, 2012

Strange weather.. 67 degrees one day, 2 inches of snow the next..  I had a birthday a couple of days ago and I remembered when I lived in Massachusetts..  I always was able to go skating on a local pond on my February birthday.  I've heard that it never gets cold enough to skate there anymore.  Sad.

Our Winter weather here in Maryland is getting a bit warmer now.  In recent years, Winter here has resembled Winter weather in Spartanburg, South Carolina in the 1980's.. requiring only light jackets, and sometimes none. However, it is never warm enough for the shorts and T-shirts that I see lots of teen-aged WalMart customers wearing in January. 

Speaking of WalMart.. I'm not sure if I posted it or not.. one day, at a WalMart near Ocean City, Maryland, Elaine was the only customer who did not sport a tatoo of some kind.. even grammar school kids. However, I can't talk.. I also have a tatoo. (I'll tell you the story someday about how and why I got it, and what it has meant for me over the years.)  But it is a little disconcerting to see an eight-year old with a dragon tatoo on an arm.

Poetry Time

Becky Herman sent out two stanzas of a poem that relates to her email experience. It was written by Mark Eckman and Jerold Zar, and the title of the piece is "Candidate for a Pullet Surprise."

I have a spelling checker
It came with my PC
It plane lee marks for my review
Mistakes I cannot sea.

I ran this poem threw it
I'm sure your pleased to no
Its letter perfect in its weigh
My checker told me sew.

Churches..pay up!

According to Lance Pierson of London, England: "Despite its venerability, the King James Version (of the Bible) remains in copyright, which is renewed on the accession of each monarch.  The Globe Theater found it had a substantial royalty bill to pay this April when its actors recited the whole text..."

Mr. Pierson has a touring acting company that has been exempted from paying royalties by the Crown copyright agents (Cambridge University Press) because they only use 90 minutes worth of the text. 


Party-givers..pay up!

Have you ever wondered why servers at restaurants sing their own versions of Happy Birthday songs?  Yes.. that song is copyrighted and if you sing the song, you are required to pay royalties, no matter where you sing it.

AARP Members..pay up!

At the local AARP Chapter meetings, we usually sing a patriotic song and also "Happy Birthday" and "Happy Anniversary."  We are law-breakers, because we are not paying royalties!

Once, when I was Chapter President, we received a letter from some copyright agent or other (I wish that I had kept the letter).. offering us a "cut-rate" for a number of years, to cover all of our versions of the "Happy Birthday" tune sung or played at our monthly meetings.

Scofflaws..pay up!

Maryland requires all organizations to file an obscure form each year.  Very few organizations have ever heard of the form.. until last year.  Some State worker with nothing much to do, collected the names of all of the Maryland organizations that had not filed the form for a while.  Under normal circumstances, the State would send out reminder notices, and no penalties would apply, unless the organization neglected to submit the form after being noticed..

However, a lawyer with nothing much to do, heard about this and offered to do it for the State and  
relieve the State of the expense of sending the reminders.  He was granted permission and sent out the notices and bills to the "miscreants" for $90 to cover his expenses. The way the notice was worded meant that organizations would have to suffer a State penalty if they did not comply.  To avoid any trouble, one of the organizations I am connected to decided to pay the $90.  I wonder how many others did, and what happened to those organizations that did not contribute to this scam.

(This is my "take" on the situation.  I may have it wrong.  If you know that situation, let me know, so I can make corrections.)

"Hi! I'm dead, but I hope you are having a nice Day!"

I hear that there is now an "app" that allows you to record a message to be posted on Facebook on the day that you die.  Wow! Scary!

This kind of reminds me of the time I went to a wake for a secretary who had worked at the Social Security Administration.  While we were sitting around her body at the funeral parlor, she walked in the door!..  We were really confused until we found out that the deceased had an identical twin.  Nobody at work knew that.. if only her sister had not decided to wear the identical suit as her sister.....

"What is your question, Miss?"

I heard on the radio that when Texas Governor Perry made a campaign stop at the Squat and Gobble Cafe in South Carolina, he called upon a maniken that he thought was a potential voter.

Where did it go?

I also heard on the radio that Samoa completely lost December 30, 2011, when the International Date Line was shifted!

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Enough foolishness!  Auf wiedersehen!
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More from January 14, 2012

Yesterday, I got so excited about "beer blogging" that my hour was up before I got into any other newspaper subject.  Let's see how far I can go today.

Mascot Bashing

The Carroll County (Maryland) Times has a picture on page one of the Baltimore Raven's football team mascot, Poe, being accosted by elementary school children, most of whom are wearing purple, Raven's color.  Today is when the Ravens get to play an important game, and the whole Baltimore metropolitan area is awash in a purple glow, as everybody waits for their local gladiators to smash the opposition, under the urging of a super enthusiastic Poe.

I remember another time when a team mascot was "accosted" by little kids.  At a church in Reisterstown, dozens of six, seven, and eight-year olds were all excited because the "Oriole Bird" was coming to visit them.  As the front door opened and the "bird" walked in, he was jumped on by all of these yelling and screaming kids.  The parents stood in the background, smiling,  as the "bird" was kicked and punched by these little barbarians. 

"Bird" yelled "Ow!" and "Stop!"  This only made the kids increase their good-natured attack.  Finally, after about 5 minutes of this abuse, the bleeding and crying "bird" said: "To hell with this stupid job!" and rushed out the door, never to be seen again around this area.  Of course, the kids were disappointed, and the parents were irate because their evening's entertainment was cut short. 

I wonder if the Raven's mascot quoteth: "Never more!"

Fun Time in Poe's Town

If you come to Baltimore for the game, remember to visit the "Block" or what's left of it.  (I wonder if Blaze Starr is still in good health.  I hope so.)

Do the Police have it Nailed Down yet?

The paper mentions two incidents of "Nail Gun" violence!  On Friday last, a 35-year old lady was charged with trying to fire a .22 caliber nail gun at two people after an argument.  On the same day, a 23-year-old man was charged with holding an air-powered nail gun to his girl-friend's head.  What is going on in Carroll County?  Are we going to become the "Nail Gun Violence" center of Maryland? 

Need a new knee?

Last December, a Carroll County Orthopedist,  Doctor Jason Hammond, performed the new "Triathalon Custom Fit Knee Procedure" for the first time in the County.  This is a type of "custom fit" knee replacement surgery, which uses 3-D software technology, as well as other "state-of-the-art" tools to make a new knee seem almost exactly like the old knee, minus the pain. 

Doctor Hammond is an interesting guy.   He is probably 6'5" tall and looks like a tough basketball player.  But, instead, he is a gentle, soft-spoken man, who seems to connect with his patients.  If you meet him, ask him to show you a picture of his triplets.. three beautiful little girls.

Elaine has been pleased with the work he did to correct a very bad break of bones in her foot, and would recommend him highly.

Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me

I only have a little time left, so I will just mention a few things brought up yesterday on my favorite radio show:

....  Surveys

A new survey reports that Americans are getting tired of surveys.

....  2012 New Hampshire Primary

A guy named Vermin "Love" Supreme was on the ballot:  he has invented a time machine so that we can go back in time to do good things like kill Hitler.  He calls himself a "friendly fascist" and would push for a nation-wide tooth-brush law, and would make sure that every citizen has a Government-provided pony, just as the Founding Fathers wanted.

http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/01/10/vermin-supreme-the-presidential-candidate-who-promises-free-ponies/


A guy named Bob Ely said that there were two dozen reasons not to vote for him.  See for yourself.

http://www.workmorekeepless.com/


Car Talk

And finally, from Click and Clack (kind of): 

Question:  What do you call a large number of funny birds sitting on a movie marquee?

Answer:  Two kilo mockingbirds.



Gasp!.. Sorry about that.

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A Dios .. probably in 2012.
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January 14, 2012

I haven't added to this blog for over a month, so here goes.

Items poking out at me from the local newspaper.. and a couple blaring at me from the kitchen radio:

Beer, Beer...

I'm pleased to read that the Yuengling Brewery has expanded once again to become the largest American beer maker.  Last year, they began to enter the Ohio market.. and you all know that those Ohio folks love their beer.. especially at the Bratwurst Festival in Bucyrus, Ohio. 

For years, I was a devoted Yuengling Beer fan.  I even made a trip to Pottsville, Pennsylvania to visit their bottling plant.  That was quite a visit.. the plant is on a very slanted street and I slid in just after an ice storm.. in spite of a few spills (of me, not the beer) I spent a pleasant hour walking through beer- sloshed floors, watching the process,  and sampling a lot of their wares.  There was a little gift shop where I purchased some frames with the Yuengling logo.  I used one of those for a neighbor who likes Yuengling beer.  I secretly took his picture and put it into the frame and surprised him with it.  I don't think his wife appreciated my effort.

Kind of like Newt Gingrich, I eventually got bored with old passions and changed my beer allegiance to India Pale Ale (IPA).  My favorites are:  Snake Dog IPA, bottled at the Flying Dog Brewery in nearby Frederick, Maryland;  Yards IPA, bottled at the Yards Brewing Company in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; Southampton Publick House IPA, bottled at the Southampton Bottling Company in Latrobe, Pennsylvania.

The British invented IPA by adding additional Hops to their beers to keep them from spoiling on the long sea transport from Britain to their troops in India.   If you like beer, try India Pale Ale.. you'll be glad you did.

Beer, Beer, Beer..

I've mentioned this in my blogs before.  I've been asked why I refuse to drink "Lite" alias "Light" beer. One day, visiting a brewery in Pennsylvania, I asked how they made their "Light" beer.  The brewmaster told me that they just add a gallon of water to each gallon of already prepared beer.  In other  words, they water down their beer and then sell it at the same price as their regular beer.  Isn't that another form of a ripoff?

I've heard that the head of an Italian family will usually add water to jugs of wine.. but that is so that more can be drunk without causing people to fall asleep at the supper table.  So, maybe that is why light beer is popular.. people can drink more without becoming drunk too soon.  But, if your desire is to become drunk, why do it slowly. Get with it.. drink vodka or rum.  Why fill yourself up slowly with watery slop to get the same effect? (Oh, I forgot to mention: vodka means "water" in Russian, and it would appear that Russians drink it right down as though it were water.  Most Americans add it to cocktail ingredients and take a longer time to get sloshed.)

Beer, Beer, Beer, Beer..

Back to beer... the best beer that I have ever tasted was sold in Germany and was called Loewenbrau (Lion's Brew) and was a German favorite.  Germans know how to make beer, and they do it using only ingredients prescribed by law since the thirteenth century.. Reinheitsgebot.  When I got back to the United States, I searched until I found a Liquor Store that sold Loewenbrau.  When I tasted it.. I spit it out.  It was not the same.

Somebody told me that they water it down for the US because Americans like lighter beer. I think they have greatly misjudged American beer drinkers and would not have their miserable sales record in the US if they got back to importing their REAL beer.

Beer, Beer, Beer, Beer, Beer..

For several years, I brewed my own beer.  It was never great beer, but it was drinkable.. and definitely not "Lite" beer.  At one time I even brewed Russian beer.. called Kvass.  I made a big mistake.. I brewed it in green beer bottles.  Those bottles have a tendency to explode, as I found out. 

One day, I made a large batch of kvass and put it in green bottles containing grapes (to help with the fermentation).  I placed them to age on shelving in my garage near the garage's rear door.  The garage was warm, the air outside was cold.  I went past the shelving, opened the door, and stepped out for just a quick moment.  When I came back in, all of the bottles had exploded and glass shards were stuck in the walls.  If I had just opened the door and not have gone out, those shards would have been stuck in me.   I stopped brewing kvass and stopped using green bottles.

Well, my hour is up and I never did get past the first item I wanted to talk about... God's gift to mankind: BEER.

Prosit!
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Looking Forward to 2012

A Beautiful Day, with Hope for the Formerly Hopeless

Isn't it a wonderful world!  The sun is streaming into the house.  My tummy is full of sausage and eggs.. and a lot of delicious Gevalia coffee.  On the radio, I'm listening to the Diane Rheem Show interviewing a Duke University neurologist who has done experiments with rhesus monkeys that show that thoughts can create motion outside of the body!  He has great hopes that his research will help trigger rehabilitation therapy (cures?) for victims of Parkinsons, and also for persons who suffer paralysis, and other neurological ailments.  His name is Miguel Nicolelis and he has written a book that I can't wait to read:  Beyond Boundaries.

A Beautiful Night, with no Hope for the Continuously Hopeless

Last night, my son and his beautiful wife treated Elaine and me to a great feast at the Texas Roadhouse.  Steak and salmon and ribs..  done just the way we all wanted them to be cooked.  Lots of peanuts to eat.. lots of peanut hulls on the floor.  Lots of fun.

Of course, everyone had to put up with my weird antics.  At one point, I was telling about my laptop recovery activity and as I showed them how I pushed down on the computer's F8 key, I, instead, pushed down on the edge of my fork and thrust it off into the stratosphere, much to the amazement and amusement of everyone in the vicinity.  Luckily, nobody was stabbed. 

In an attempt to regain my composure, I asked the waitress to bring me a frosty mug for my beer. (Apparently, I am the only person in the U.S. that doesn't drink their beer directly out of the bottle.) As I casually poured my beer into the mug, it overflowed before I could do Elaine's trick of sticking a finger in the froth to stop the flow.  Now that I had inundated the table and napkins with Sam Adams Winter Ale, after conducting a  physics experiment with my fork, everyone could relax and enjoy their meals. 

Computer Stuff.. skip it if you don't give a damn

I am typing this on that laptop that I mentioned.  I love the way it works for me.. usually.  But it has this tendency to not recognise certain codes that are generated and passed from module to module.  The first time this happened, I sent the laptop back to Dell and they returned it in workable condition. 

A few months later, it happened again and I found that if I tried the reboot option 20 or more times, it  would apparently say to itself: "The poor chump has given it 20 tries, lets give him a break this time," and the laptop would start working again.   This happened a few times more.

After a year or so of quiescence, recently, it started its antics again.  But this time, no matter how many times I tried to reboot, it still did not recognise the codes necessary to continue properly.  So I tried any number of tests that could be done, including a 12 hour check of all memory and components, with no success.  I even went into "command mode", but could not remember the DOS commands that would be of any help.

Finally, I began to concentrate on the computer's F8 key.  I hoped that this would get me into what us old computer types call "Safe Mode", although I didn't know what that would do.  I tried every combination of F8 pressure.. except one.. with no success.  Finally, in exasperation, I tried the last resort.. I pressed the F8 key and held it down before and during the pressing of the restart button.  It worked!  Now I am back in business and can take a look at the 892 email messages that have built up while I was "computer-less."

OK.. OK.. for those who know me.. yes, I do have other computers.  I have the desktop that I use as the base for my internal network, I have a small notebook computer, I have a clone of the first portable computer ever  made, and I have two cracked screen laptops.  They all work.

If you haven't heard the story of how one of the laptops got its cracked screen, let me know.  It's a great story.  I've told the story somewhere in one of my blogs.

Fly me to the Moon

My son and one of my sons-in-law showed me a remarkable feature on their DROIDs.  Since I also have a DROID, I, of course, wanted that feature.  Besides it is free.   It's called GOOGLE SKY, and my wonderful relatives downloaded the APP (application) for me.  Now, whenever I want to know what that bright light is way up there in the heavens, I can hold my DROID up, pointed to the object, and it will let me know if it is Jupiter, or Saturn, or the Moon, or Sky-Lab. 

It also shows the outlines of the sky features, such as the Big Dipper (Ursa Major) or Cassiopeia.  This is the fantastic product of an amazing computer programmer!  How he or she did this bends my mind.  I love it!

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My hour is up..  see ya!

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Brain Power

I haven't added to this blog for a while and I know that everybody is wondering why.  (Actually nobody noticed.)

Anyway, today I want to share with you a game that I invented and call "Joe's Triplets."  Many years ago, before the age of cell phones that contained games and other fantastic "apps", I would get bored driving or being driven for long trips.  Looking for license plates from other States quickly loses interest.  Something else was needed.  So, I developed this game:

As you progress through an area with parked or moving cars, check out the first three letters of selected license plates.  Take those three letters and make up words or phrases using those letters, in order.  It's as simple as that, but mind-expanding if you concentrate.   For example, last Tuesday, while walking through the Social Security Headquarters parking lot in Baltimore, I copied down the first three letters from the license plates of some of the cars I passed.  As I did, I made up words and phrases from the letters, and wrote them down as follows: (the parking lot guard watched me very carefully as I did this)

Letters    Phrase or Word Examples

MPW     manpower     moping wimp     lame paws

KPL     Park Place     dark palace     take a pulse

HDR     header     hot dog relish     shade roller

KBF     black buffalo     kick-boxing fighter     pink bifocals

MTF     mountain flower     a minute to five     mouthy fink!

XCZ     excess zest     extra cut zinnias     tax-cut denizens

KHS     pink house     skinheads     thick thumbs

LTL     little     last lamb     Atlanta Lions

WYC  Wayne County     Why complain?     chewy cupcakes

KYH     keyhole     frisky hound     skinny youth

Now I know that some license plates do not start with all letters, so I have developed this variant.  If the first three positions of the plate start with any of the numbers from 1 to 9, change the numbers to the corresponding letters of the alphabet, A through I.  (Zero always counts as the letter O.)

68Z  becomes FHZ  -  fish zipper     fight zone     flashy Amazon

32J  becomes  CBJ  -  Cabin John     I can buy Jello.     Crummy beer joint!

7K6  becomes GKF - aging kinfolk     Go kill the fleas!     eighty kingfishers

I must warn you, this becomes addictive.  I've been doing it for many many years and I can't stop.  However, if you do try this game, in no time at all, you will have stretched and enriched your brain so much that Mr. Alzheimer will be unable to penetrate it.  Soon, you will be as smart as Professor Einstein...

I guarantee it!

Happy New Year 2012!

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